Monday, October 31, 2016


The other day I had a black bird fly in front of my card.  A crow most likely since in this area I don't think we have Ravens.  Similar birds, though the Raven is a bit larger.  Then yesterday on the show Sunday Morning, they had a feature on the Raven. So today being All Hallows Eve I thought it appropriate to read more on the Raven.

Healing, Initiation, and Protection are the descriptive words use in the accompanied book of The Druid Animal Oracle.
Possibly the ending of one thing and the beginning of another is also a prophecy of the Raven.  With that interpretation many believe the Raven is an omen of death, especially since the bird feeds on dead things.
 Maybe a reading of Edgar Allan Poe's THE RAVEN is in order today, although I remember it long and tedious; the loss of a loved one, nevermore to return.  Maybe that is why so many associate the raven to death. 

Today I will remember those that have moved on and left the Planet.  I am grateful for the time I got to get to know them and love them. 

Philip and Stephanie Carr-Gomm

Sunday, October 30, 2016

New Moon

Dark of the Moon

Yesterday I had several rising tides of frustration and anger.  I lashed out at another on the phone even though I knew it wouldn't solve the issue.  I had a conversation with one of my sisters that made me feel a bit uneasy and then frustrated then unhappy with myself.  And several other instances when my anger just about got the best of me.  Where did it come from?  How can I go along all peaceable like and then have those 'tower' moments? 
Healing work can be done during this moon phase.  I think I will write it all down today and then burn the pages and release my anger and frustration.
Hope springs eternal.

Saturday, October 29, 2016

Flights of fancy/fantasy

Dreamland Express

There are times I awaken from a dream that is so vivid and full of action that I wonder is it a fantasy, a remembrance, or a bit of hodgepodge mixed up from my subconscious.  What feeds our dreams - our imaginations; books, films, Facebook, billboards, tv, self indulgence, or our own narcissism?
We read so many articles and accounts of how the subconscious does not distinguish from what is real or imagined, to it, it is all real.  If we tell ourselves it is real, it does become real.  I read accounts of the placebo effect all the time these days.  I do lots of affirmations to help me shore myself up, physically, mentally, spiritually.
I am not sure,  but there are times I want to stay in that dreamland state and become sadly disappointed when I have to get up to pee and re-enter the now.

I am grateful for my imagination, long may it serve me.

The Marco Polo Tarot - LoScarabeo  ~ artwork by Severino Baraldi

Friday, October 28, 2016


No pressure no diamonds.

What looks like a hunk of rock to one, another knows with a bit of time and pressure, transformation can occur.  I said the other day and this hints at it again.  "When the student is ready the teacher appears."
It makes me think of the show on NOVA the other evening which featured sink holes.  How much can our lovely Planet Earth endure when we keep mining and digging out her insides.  Earth I am sure is on the verge of some major transformation.  I hope and pray for the best. Maybe we (human race) need to face some massive pressure to change.
Which spins me to microcosms/macrocosm.  Individuals facing pressures to change them which in turn can save our Planet.
I made a comment the other day to another that I wonder if God will ask us when we meet up after we leave the Planet, " how did you take care of and appreciate My wonderful gift that I gave you with the lovely Planet Earth?"

The Marco Polo Tarot

Thursday, October 27, 2016

Port of Call

Responsibility before self expression.

I wonder.  Often, I give up my time to be my most authentic self to make sure the job is done.  Making sure that I keep a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food on the table.  When the client and customers call I put my own needs to the side and take care of theirs.  I don't do it 24/7 like I did when I got started.  I still work with the premise of 'strike while the iron is hot.'  Which now that I think of it is my center card in my Autumnal reading.
Work, work, work, has been instilled in me and it is true of my Capricorn nature.  But I wonder if I had been encouraged to continue with my poetry when I was a teenager what a different woman I would be.  Both life's are worth tipping my cup to, still         I wonder.

I am grateful for all that is well in my world.

The Marco Polo Tarot

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Don't throw caution to the wind

Again something just doesn't feel right.  This Two of Cups has a touch of malevolence to it.  The agreement just made is precarious at best since the man looks to be stepping off into what appears to be a reflection pool and what is up with that broken picture frame?

This reminds me of a song by the Temptations, Smiling Faces.

"Smiling faces, Smiling Faces, Sometimes they don't tell the truth.
Smiling faces, smiling faces tell lies and I got proof.
Your enemy won't do you no harm, 'cause you'll know where he's comin' from; don't let the handshake and the smile fool ya.
Take my advice I'm only tryin' to school ya."

Sometimes we have to work and deal with people that are just not playing fair.  It is part of Life.  Just need to be a bit cautious sometimes.  Be a bit careful of who we trust with what and where we place our next step.

Intuition will help; thankfully for the most part mine is usually spot on.

The Marco Polo Tarot

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Everybody turn to page nine

When the student is ready the teacher will arrive.
I wonder who  is the teacher and who is the student? The booklet says one is The Hermit and the other is a monk.

I think of the Monk and the Hermit as interchangeable titles for a person that has withdrawn to study, to tune into the subtle energies of the Universe.  To seek to know the unknown.  I guess we can give a variety of meanings to those that take the inner path of enlightenment.  I am drawn to the donkey in the picture, with the red fringed adornment. Quite and steady and follows a path only known to the donkey.  Also with the three they are definitely placed in a downward triangle notating the unconscious mind.  Not sure about the symbolism on the Hermits lantern.  Three Hermits, three trees, and the triangle all notating the Trinity.  Mind, body, spirit...and other such interpretations of three's, including this, that, and the other.
Guess I may hear from a teacher today in whatever guise the the Hermit may be in.  Pay attention Carolyn

Thank goodness for teachers.  They take us from the home of childhood and give us a strong foundation of the possibilities of learning.

The Marco Polo Tarot - Lo Scarabeo

Monday, October 24, 2016

Book covers

Something is amiss in this portrayal of the Three of Pentacles.  The Marco Polo Tarot has an Asian based theme, and these three don't appear to be of Asian decent. Are they master craftsmen, paid labor, or prison labor?

I best be aware today because all may not be what it seems.  Makes me think about the adage - don't judge a book by it's cover.  We really should not make assumptions of people.  The clothes that are worn, the work that they do and the places where we find or meet them.  But we do.  Most all go by first impressions, though to do so limits us of real discovery. 
So today if something just doesn't feel 'right'  I will give it some extra attention.  Practical observation with no presentiment hopefully will give me insight into a possible difficult situation.

Thank goodness for craftsmen and women, who build and develop so many useful tools that make my life easier.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

In the moment

Covet: to want (something you do not have) very much.

Gets us in real trouble to desire something so much that we will go to great lengths to obtain it.  Here is betrayal. The standing guardsman intention is not to protect but to take.  At what cost?
When we covet something, there really is no satisfaction once obtained.  Items, tokens, commodities come and go.  Sure it is wonderful to have nice things.  A home, food on the table, clothes, cars, and candy, but really, things don't bring satisfaction.
Self acceptance, love, family, friends, and our community are much more important.   For today if there is a bit of snit over something I will just release the action of disagreement and let someone else have their way.

I am grateful for home, food on the table, clothes, cars, and candy and realize all that I have is a blessing.

Lo Scarabeo  - Artwork by Severino Baraldi

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Pennies from heaven

Are there truths about ups and downs?  What goes up must come down.  How is it that some people seem to be more lucky or live in harmony with the world around them than others?  Is there a tally sheet that the Universe has?

Age old questions that most of us think about and ask ourselves from time to time.  Some of the 'teachers' tell us that we are here to just enjoy ourselves, to immerse ourselves in our humanism.  Kind of hard for people who don't have two pennies to rub together.
Sometimes I get in the mindset of lack and then I look around and see how much I have and how blessed I am.  Nope not a millionaire maybe closer to a hundredaire since accident but I do really well, besides you can't take it with you.
That reminds me; collecting pennies for Unicef when I was a little girl.  Usually around Halloween we got those little white cards with slots to load and line up pennies for the poor.  Now instead of giving pennies away I collect them off the streets, parking lots, and sidewalks. All for the elusive good luck that I keep looking for.

I am grateful for loose change.  I have some I am going to roll up today and treat myself to a new blouse.  Thank you very much for those tossed pennies.

Rider Waite-Smith Tarot

Friday, October 21, 2016

Words of Wisdon

I still remember one of the most major choices I made in my life.  I was fairly young, seven years old and made a decision that has shaped my life.  I remember lots of times when the path split and I had to make a choice this way or that.

I still from time to time seek divine guidance in my life.  Not sure I always get it, but it never hurts to ask.  Sometimes I get no answer and I am sure it is because I might have ignored the last advice I was given so now I have to muddle through and finish what I started.
Both these individuals have their palms open and in a questioning pose.  I think he is asking her "why not me" and she is asking something beyond, "should I or shouldn't I"
Do we give our choices away so we don't have to be responsible?  I have asked this question of myself many times.  Mostly I choose, but there are times....
This week I have seen some iconic figures in the cards and it feels like all the messages are about a choice and being comfortable or okay with my decision.  Feels like I am being given some ethereal advice.  I am being prepared, I think, for one of those major life choices.
I am grateful for the guidance and advice so I can choose what is best for me. 

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Watch where you step

We are what we do.
We do what we are.

This person doesn't want to change.  Just now I am thinking of the advice the Emperor wanted to give me yesterday.  Sometimes we just have to go through the trials and errors of our own to figure it out.
Just about a month ago on September 22 with Equinox, I drew a spread and the center card was the Seven of Wands expressed a bit differently, so I think I need to give this card a bit more consideration today as it pertains to my day to day things during the Autumn.  I wonder why she/he has chosen to wear different shoes?   Haven't figured that one out yet.  Maybe the different shoes goes back to figuring out those things that work or don't work for me - trials and errors.

                                                                  The Autumnal Spread

Rider Waite-Smith Tarot
The Gaian Tarot

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Oh all right.

No matter what image is crafted for The Emperor, this is the flash image that my minds eye sees when he makes his appearance.  The RWS deck was not the first deck that I worked with, but it is the one that I have spent the most time with.

Another strong archetype.  The Devil yesterday and The Emperor today.   Maybe they are brothers -  Zeus, Hades, and the third Poseidon, who I am sure will show up and make his point.  Both the emperor and the devil look directly at me to try to pin me with their gazes.  I don't do well with authoritative figures so I have a tendency not to take bossy advice.
Today I will obey the rules because I think the advice this emperor is trying to tell me is spot on.  "for once Carolyn just do as I say"
If he would just say 'recommend' instead of 'say' I wouldn't get my hackles up.
Reminds me not to cut my nose off in spite of my face.  Ha

Today I am grateful that I can still choose the direction of my days.

The Rider Waite-Smith Tarot

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

trick or treat

Such an iconic figure, The Devil.   So many things and situations attributed to the symbolism. Restrictions, limitations, excuses, weakness, evil, debauchery.  I was introduced to the devil in my youth through my Catholic upbringing.  He holds no sway with me now.

When I see the word devil I automatically think of the word reversed, lived.  I wonder is that how this figure was named.  Someone sometime back in history thought how can we control the masses?  Through mystification of course and who or what can we scare them with to keep them from living their own lives.  Living - lived - devil.  Within the word devil is lie and lied.  The devil is a lie.
We can also find vile, evil, veil, vie, live and die.
He didn't make a mess of it, he didn't make me do it,  he isn't responsible for the details, and the disguise he supposedly wears is just us being human.  So we can make a mess of things, doesn't make us bad.

I am grateful for my early education.  Heaven and Hell played a big part of the those years of study.  Now I choose.


Monday, October 17, 2016

One more please

I wonder how many are affected by the influence of a Full Moon.  The one overhead the last few nights has been extraordinary.

This Eight of Cups doesn't feel like walking away from anything; more like in search of something else.  If the the nine of cups is joy, satisfaction, and a happy sense of completion, this eight of cups feels like the search for the one more thing to make me happy.
I can't decide if it is a negative or positive quest.  The suggestion of the nine of cups says positive.  Do I really need to search for one more thing to make me happy?  Maybe. 
Yesterday I went to a little Unity Church in the neighborhood.  The moderator's topic was compassion, mostly for ourselves.  There was this little handout that was a self-graded questionnaire she asked all to do.  I did not.  When she saw that I was not participating, she questioned me on it and seemed a bit annoyed with me.  After the service she stopped me and asked me and I told her I didn't feel like validating or invalidating myself with the questionnaire.  (it was not how I wanted to fill my extra cup yesterday)


Saturday, October 15, 2016


This Queen of Wands seems to have lost her spark. She appears dark with not much light or fire energy left.  Maybe she got caught in the habit of doing too much for too many.  She actually feels like a reversed queen of wands and when I scanned the card in, the image scanned upside down.
-No Coincidences-   I rescanned the card for a better look see.

  Depleted with nothing left to give.  When we have done all that we can do-it is best to withdrawal and give it a rest.  If we don't we can slip to the darker side of our nature, become embittered, wounded, disenchanted and from there what do we have left to give?
Is she a reminder or a warning...

I understand the shadows, I don't like being in them and I try to make sure I don't linger there.  They help me appreciate the Light and that I am very grateful for. 

The Linestrider's Tarot - Siolo Thompson

Friday, October 14, 2016

Do I have too?

I think we all have moments in life that we stop and ask ourselves "What the hell was that, or What the hell just happened." A Tower moment.  A huge upheaval or some significant shift and the World as we knew it has changed.

I woke a second time this morning hearing myself at that moment when I came back to my body at one of my Tower moments.  Side of the highway in the midst of storm, "help me - help me" It was at that moment that the EMT's began to try to revive me.  As I approached my body and heard that plea for help I thought to myself who is saying that " help me - help me" in that tinny broken whispered plea?  Realizing it was me I had also returned back to the broken body that had survived the fall.
They are called NDE's- near death experiences.  Not all Tower moments bring us to this point but all Tower moments are fulcrums of change.  There are many days that I wished the me of me had not come back to whisper that plea of help, but here I am.  I hope that this card only came to me because of the dream that I had this morning and doesn't bring some new upheaval.

I am grateful for all those that offered a helping hand or a prayer then and now.

Thursday, October 13, 2016

Wing and a prayer

Here another day with birds.  The author intersperses animals throughout the deck and doesn't confine any certain animal to any particular element.  Today cups, yesterday wands, before that pentacles.  Lots of birds are the wing, with the seasons changing.  Flying towards warmer destinations.

After I was hurt a few years ago, as part of my healing journey I worked with an Energy Healer for months.  I believe that it really did help a lot.  The thing is she had two giant parrots in cages in her home.  Her home had an extended breakfast nook off kitchen and it was there they lived in cages.  I don't think we should keep animals in cages for our enjoyment, but given this gal was a more 'spiritual' type of person I figured they must been rescued animals and she cared for them. The birds were quite vocal and one day they were even more so than others.  I commented on it and she said she had not let them out of their cages recently because she needed to clip their wings to keep them from flying about.  I couldn't go back.  Just like that my time with her was done.
The promised happiness of the rainbow is different for everyone.
Last night I watched Nature on PBS that featured hummingbirds, that thankfully, were flying free and allowed to live their lives their way.

The Linestrider Tarot

Wednesday, October 12, 2016


Immediately upon drawing this card I saw the bird, the one just about to get in the middle of something it has no business getting involved in.   Is this the same bird on the end of the stick that the gal was carrying yesterday?  I wondered about that bird yesterday and maybe this card hints at it.

Maybe the gal saw the exchange on the path ahead and of course the bird was killed in the skirmish.  Maybe she picked it up and stuck it on her stick as a reminder to herself, if you go looking for trouble don't blame the consequences on the circumstances.  That bird was in the wrong place at the wrong time by choice.
Maybe the bird is just a reminder to think things through before getting in a argument about  something.
Maybe they are the two canines from the Moon and somehow they have lost themselves from the intuitive path they were on and have reverted to their more basic instincts.

Thankfully I can still look upon most things objectively and have an open mind that I can make up myself.  Thank you very much.

The Linestriders Tarot

Tuesday, October 11, 2016


Do we isolate ourselves because we are fearful or does fear isolate us?  I look at those questions and also wonder are they stating the same or different perspectives?  Do we leave the safe and known because for some reason it doesn't feel safe?  And, is whats out there any better than what we leave behind?
I am working with a very challenging person.  She views most if not all of her life from behind the lens of fear.  The world and everyone in it  is out to get her.  There is no way that I can talk to her with out every-thing being said becoming twisted, mostly because she is in such a spin, always twisting this way and that trying to see what is coming at her...paranoia is its name.   The home has been ordered by the Court to get the home sold because her and her brother cannot agree; I got the golden ticket to sell the place.
 I find myself on my own more and more and I wonder is it possible that some sort of fear has taken hold of me since the tornado and that I will find myself in this lost and lonely place?
Thankfully I still have enough wits about me and chose the direction that I head off to.  For today that is enough.

The Linestrider's Tarot

Monday, October 10, 2016

What is going on?

I did not tune in and listen to the presidential debate last night or the the first one for that matter.  I did not want to listen to the bs and hatefulness that was dispensed.  Now there will be days, weeks, and yes years that people will rehash it all, no matter who becomes our next president.
Maybe more of us should be like this rat, instead of taking what is offered, figure out what needs to be done and become the instrument of change.  This is a weird portrayal of the six of pents. There is no way birds would be complacent about a rat in their midst. Maybe yesterday's Hanged Man advises me to look at things from a different view point.

I am grateful that I have options in my day to day life. Good, bad, or indifferent, I get to choose.

Th Linestrider Tarot

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Stripes a fashion choice

Does the World change when we change the way we view it?  A Wayne Dyer quote comes to mind when I see The Hanged Man - "Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change."
Fair enough I guess and quite often true, but not with tigers.  A tiger can't change his stripes.

There have been lots of times in my life that I have tried to see anothers perspective and to be honest there have been lots of times I could care less what others thought.  My thoughts on some things have softened or maybe even changed over the years and there are many more that run deep and will not change, at least not in this life.
One thing I have learned is it doesn't work trying to change someone, it never works out well when you make another wrong.
I am who I am and I try to remember to let others be who they are; which I must add is quite challenging since as a Capricorn I know that 99.9% of the time I am right.  Oh Well.

America feels like a Three Ring Circus right now.  I am grateful to live in this great Country no matter which way you look at it.

LINESTRIDERS Journey Tarot - Siolo Thompson

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Give it a day

What a difference one card to the next card in the sequence, or from one day to the next.  How can these symbols of disc or pentacles be so completely different?

I drew the 7 of Discs again today and my perception of the image hasn't really changed in the last two days. I went looking for the 8 of Discs for comparison, and since it is  the eighth day of month it seemed reasonable to see what may follow the 7 by viewing the 8. The images are very different and the 8th disc is incomplete, or seems to be an unfinished disc. Best I got is each day begins anew and what we scribe on the our daily chart is all left up to us. 
I am grateful for each new day to see what it beholds.

THE SACRED CIRCLE TAROT - Anna Franklin & Paul Mason

Friday, October 7, 2016


Life is always about choices.  Yes or no, here or there, or a bit of this or that.  These three cups stand at the ready for me to fill them as I please.   What's your choice Carolyn?   The cups are framed in a splay of lavender, to relieve me of any anxiety I may have about my choices. 

My Mother loved to sing little ditties. Lots of them were non-sensical bits of  rhythmic tunes.  I still hear them to this day.  Today's card reminds of one -
"Lucky lucky lucky me, I'm a lucky son of a gun,
I work eight hours
I sleep eight hours
That leaves eight hours for fun."

Maybe that is what these three cups bring to me; a remembrance of what to fill my cups with - work, sleep, and play.  Pretty easy and simple.

I am grateful for easy breezy days and remind myself to always say thank you, whether my cup runneth over or not.

The Sacred Circle Tarot

Thursday, October 6, 2016


When I first drew this 7 of Discs I wondered for a bit how the two images related to each other.  After immersing myself in the card I became overwhelmed with melancholy; what loneliness prevails in these two images.

Front and center one disc stands apart from the six.  They all appear to be the same yet one is not part of the others.  Separated by design or oversight?  The Quoits, standing stones, have always reminded me of Stone People waiting for the return of others.  Keeping a vigilant watch for others that never returned. Separated, but hopeful.
Is there a part of us that we keep unto ourselves?  Is that what makes us unique and if we dare to share that spark of individuality will we be shunned or ridiculed?  I just looked at the word individuality and see individual and duality(something to ponder).
There are some in this world who only have lived in shadow never experiencing the light.
I for one, am grateful to feel the pangs of sorrow, for to know sorrow means I have also felt the flush and glow of joy.

Prudence: wisdom and good judgement

Wednesday, October 5, 2016


Youthful energy in abundance.  Watching small children jumping, bouncing, running all over the place, I have often remarked, as others have too,  'it would be fabulous to bottle that energy and use some it for ourselves.'

This Page has heard the call of something beyond her/himself.  The higher calling to do something with all that energy.  I notice the duality in the card in the presence of the four elements in pairs.  Two bits of fire, two discs or pentacles, two dragonflies for water, two wisps of smoke for air.
A lot of days I have noticed when I draw the Page of Wands my intuition is heightened.  I sense more that just the normal day to day things that surround me.  Ether and Earth, again duality that harkens the images of The Magician and The High Priestess.  Today I have a feeling something opens up for me and the energy of this Page will help me along the way.

I am grateful for my intuition, it has helped me make some really good choices.

The Sacred Circle Tarot

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Creative Inspiration

Curious, these three discs with their carved faces.  I took a bit and looked at all the discs or pentacles  in this deck and only the three has facial carvings.  I then went looking at the rest of the cards and found similar carvings on the Ace of Cups, which is symbolic of the Gunderstrup cauldron. An ancient artifact from the early Celtic period.

It had to take deep commitment and vast amounts of talent and determination to make the Gunderstrup caldron or any other aritfacts in such a time in history.  These three discs are a nod to the artisans and craftsmen that dedicated themselves to their natural talent. 
We all have an innate talent, a lot of us never even realize the the gifts buried within ourselves.  I never could draw a stick person or have any significant ability with the arts; my skill set lies elsewhere, but I can sure appreciate others' dedication and commitment.  I received a beautiful piece of tapestry from a lovely artisan named Sharyn the other day, a quilt the size of a placemat,  oh my, how lovely.  Day five and I am still running my fingers across the stitching. 
Today I am grateful for the shear beauty of art in all of its forms.

 The Sacred Circle Tarot - Anna Franklin & Paul Mason

Monday, October 3, 2016

Mind Set - Skill Set

Autumn arrived this last week.  Last Monday a cooler surge of air pressed it's way into the area tempering those last days of sweltering heat.  The Wheel continues the turn towards years end.

With the shorter cooler days I tend to get more complacent in my lifestyle.  This knights example is to not take myself and my work for granted.  Though the work that I do slows at this time of year there are always things to tend to; Me being the most important.  I always feel a sense of accomplishment after a good day of work. 

I am reflecting on the Magician, Seven of Fire, and the Queen of Earth for my Autumnal quest; remembering each had their place and tempo of work.  Now that I think about it each also did what they did on their own, no seeming commitment, just doing what they do and enjoying themselves.  Like the knight practicing his skill, the most important thing is to show up everyday.

The Sacred Circle Tarot

Sunday, October 2, 2016

Let me think about it

Whenever I hear of some new bit of information, I have the option to accept, reject, or assimilate it in to my collective consciousness.  Younger, I soaked up all the new bits of this and that but as the years roll on most of what comes across as "new information" is just ignored.

Here it seems I have more information or news that is on its way to me.  I am fairly sure that I have enough intel to make the informed decisions that suit me.  I turn off the local and national news more often than not. Magazines and newspaper are filled with advertisements and scandal.  As I age I am 'told' to keep learning to keep the wheels in my head turning but that is not the same as mental discipline.  All those self-help books are just repetition with different by-lines.  The only thing that is worth listening to are updates on family and friends.

I am grateful that I can read and write. I am also grateful that I still have the mental acuity to dismiss most of the hyperbole.

THE SACRED CIRCLE TAROT -Anna Franklin and Paul Mason

Saturday, October 1, 2016


Laughter.  It really is the best medicine, as they say.  Trapped in a sea of melancholy, laugh yourself to the shore of renewed hope.
I know if I hear someone laugh it becomes contagious and I begin to smile inside and then with a bit of encouragement a bubble of my own laughter emerges.  The mood lightens and lifts and life is good/better.

"I love people who make me laugh.  I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh.  It cures a multitude of ills.  It's probably the most important thing in a person." -Audrey Hepburn

HEALING WITH THE FAIRIES Oracle Cards -Doreen Virtue